Thursday, 20 May 2021

In and out of a Dark place

 In the latter part of 2019 I was diagnosed with cancer in my bladder and since then have had two courses of BCG treatments. Each of which was six weeks long with a three month break and numerous other procedures in-between.

BCG is a type of immunotherapy drug. Immunotherapy drugs encourage the body's immune system to fight cancer cells. For bladder cancerBCG is given directly into the bladder (intravesical). This can make the bladder react in a way that makes the immune system get rid of cancer cells.

Well ! What can I say except that I went into a dark place for awhile... until I reached an understanding within that there were a few other times that I came close to losing my life. I shall not enumerate them here; except that one was when I nearly drowned and saw as, I sank to the bottom my oxygen bubbles going upwards in the green silent water.

A few weeks ago we (Mrs H and I) met with the Urology Consultant of Tallaght University Hospital a teaching hospital in County Dublin, Ireland, whose academic partner is Trinity College Dublin. He informed us that my cancer has now invaded the muscle bladder and that the best thing to do is to remove the bladder along with the prostrate - this surprised me because I have never had a problem with it. Ah' well that's the way the cookie crumbles.

This week we had a meeting with actual Consultant who will be removing the offending organ. He detailed the various procedures that will be performed during the operation and detailed the recovery care afterwards etc. 

Prior to the removal I shall be having a meeting with the Chemotherapy Professor who will access my suitability and then pass me forward to the Anesthatist - I feel that I should share with you all that the very first time that the surgeons removed foreign bits from the bladder the effects of the anaesthetic left me HAPPILY hallucinating for two days afterwards and I recall standing on the roof of Tallaght Hospital and seeing Mrs H driving along the approach road, I was so floaty ! 

I think that I ought to cease now just in case I relapse into that space again. So take care all you and I will catch up with you all later xx


  1. Sending you best wishes for a successful operation and a full and speedy recovery! A friend of ours beat bladder cancer a couple of years ago, and may you do the same!

  2. I hope that all goes well for you and that you don't visit any more dark places. You will be in my thoughts and they will all be positive.

  3. Well that’s a bitch old lad, wishing a speedy recovery

  4. Good Luck and look forward to hearing from you soon.

  5. Wishing you a successful and quick surgery. Speedy recovery once that's all over with. Best of luck and hope to see you blogging again.

  6. I wondered why we hadn’t heard from you for so long, now we know. Sending you love and light.


  7. Oh Mel, this is both serious and positive news. I'm so pleased to see/hear from you again and I shall keep everything crossed that the treatment is successful and trouble free. Sending hugs!

  8. Dear Mel, I've been thinking of you and wondering how you are. Hoping against hope you are making progress.